I’m going to skip all of my usual dramtic pre-story storytelling and get right to the point of this entry: The Live show.
Live came on late. The sound check ran for what seemed like an eternity. Then, the magic moment--that second after the lights go down a notch and your band is going to come out on stage--that moment happened . . . and was promptly ruined. Just as the lights dimmed, I was violently shoved forward by some asshole punk kid who was way too excited to be there. Sweaty, screaming, and stupid-looking, he elbowed his way from the back to meet my unyielding bulk. Some words were exchanged--for some reason, he kept calling me ’’baby’’ even as he cursed at me--and I did some shoving back, but the jerk was persistent. I’ll skip the details of the encounter and just say that I have never been so close to throwing a right cross in my life. He ended up right next to me for the duraton of the show, so, frustrated, I had to exact my petty revenege.
Here’s a tip for all of you concert-goers: I have a passive aggressive way of retaliating against anyone who is rude to me at a concert. And by rude, I mean anything from standing too close to repeatedly touching/bumping me during the show. What I do is light up a cigarette and smoke the whole thing right next to them. All the while, I nonchalantly blow smoke into their face and hair and flick my ashes onto their clothes. This last bit is a little tricky; I almost caught some guy’s polyester pants on fire with a still-burning ember I flicked. Luckily, they didn’t go up in a blaze of fire, but they now have a nice little hole burned in the ass. It’s a subtle trick, but highly effective. They end up dirty and smelling terrible, and I get to feel a little better about life.
But anyway . . .
The Live show was somewhat dissappointing, unfortunately. The sound check, as long as it was, didn’t seem to be worth the time and wait. The drums were too loud, the keyboards were almost nonexistent, and the vocals were pretty lame. All the Live performances I’ve seen on television were loaded with intensity, passion, and heart. But seeing them for myself was somewhat of a letdown. Ed Kowalcyzk seemed more interested in shaking his ass and preening for the crowd than getting the message of the music across. They did do a wonderful rendition of ’’Turn My Head’’ and Ed slipped the lyrics to U2’s ’’One’’ into ’’They Stood Up for Love.’’ For the encore, Ed and the keyboardist did a moving version of ’’Overcome,’’ and I felt the ooginess of the whole experience slip away a little.
The best part of the whole evening, unbelieveably, was the opening band, Pseudopod. A five piece band from Los Angeles, Pseupod infused fun and frenzy with funk and rock music. I have never had so much fun watching (and listening to) a band outside of a Spoonfed show. I danced, I clapped, I laughed with pure happiness. At one point during the set, an adorable gray and black dog ran out on the stage! Pseudopod kept playing, talking to the dog and laughing among themselves. The singer got on the microphone and explained that the dog--named Oliver--belonged to the band and wanted to come out and say hello. I almost died laughing and jumping around. Unlike Live’s set, there was a sense of joy and fun around Pseudopod. I suggest you go online and check them out; it’d be well worth it.
So, long story short, Live’s lame, Pseudopod’s the best! Also, a big fat thank you to Chris for taking me to the show and being my big bad protector during Live’s set. And, a word to the wise: If you’re gonna be standing around for four hours pressed up against a couple hundred other people, wear comfortable shoes!
And as a reminder (as if I haven’t mentioned it enough), I’m going back to Austin this coming up weekend for the Austin City Limits Music Festival. I’ll write you guys all about it when I get back.
Until next time,
Holly
